how i find lovely

Recently, I was chosen to help launch Annie F. Downs' new book, Looking for Lovely. This book is beautiful and challenging and feels like it was written just for me. (You can see a full review on my book review blog.)

Annie shares about some struggles she's gone through and how she came to look for lovely--and honestly, though we are obviously very different people, much of her journey mirrors my own ("ugly" high school years, a love for Les Miserables, being single into the mid-30's, a PCOS diagnosis), helping me to even more fully relate to her writing.

The idea that impacted me the most was the concept of looking for lovely in our everyday lives. It's no secret that the last few years have been rough, thanks to health struggles. While I'm feeling much better now, I still have rough days. And on those days, it's pretty easy to focus on the pain and not on the good. But I think it's even more important to look for lovely on those rough days! Since I began reading this book, I've been consciously looking for lovely ... and I've been taking pictures of what I find so I can remember.

One of the biggest things I've done is make an event out of a meal. Most of the time, I eat supper on the couch while watching TV. There's nothing wrong with that, but I feel so much happier and more fulfilled when I use pretty dishes and actually sit at my (now cleaned off) table. I have so many fun dishes, so why not use them?

Obviously, I'm a big fan of roasted green beans. You would be too if you tried them. And yes, sometimes I watch Friends as I eat. (Bonus points if you can identify the episode!)

Sunday was one of my rougher days recently. I just physically didn't feel well. But because I was consciously looking for lovely, I found several bright spots.

The coolest "lovely" moment on Sunday couldn't be captured by a camera, though. At the end of one of the chapters, Annie recommends downloading a new-to-you worship album. Because I've heard so much about Bethel Music lately, I went to Amazon Prime music and randomly picked one of their albums: You Make Me Brave (Live). I was almost finished with the book, and Annie was talking about the song "We Dance": how the Holy Spirit laid it on her heart one morning, and it was another reminder of God's love. She quoted some of the lyrics, and as I read the words, I realized I was hearing them, too. "We Dance" was playing on my tablet. It was such a lovely coincidence-but-not-really moment!

I'm going to continue to look for lovely, and I encourage you to look, as well! And because I loved this book so much, I'm giving one away! Enter through the easy Rafflecopter form below. (Rules: Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. Contest is open in the US only. Winner will be selected at random using Rafflecopter.com and will have 48 hours to respond to email notification, or another winner will be chosen.)a Rafflecopter giveaway

Disclosure of material connection: As a member of Annie F. Downs' launch team, I received a free advance copy of this book. All opinions are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

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it wasn't supposed to be like this

When I was a kid, I learned my parents were 24 when they got married. That sounded positively ancient. Surely I'd get married much sooner than that!

I am currently mere days away from my 32nd birthday. And I'm still single.

I had always imagined that by this point in my life, I'd have a husband, two or three kids, and be a stay-at-home mom. For whatever reason, God has put me on a different path. Most of the time, I'm okay with this—I'm actually glad I didn't marry young, as I've done a lot of growing up in the 14 years since I graduated from high school. I enjoy the freedom I have as a single woman; I don't really have to consider anyone else when deciding on purchases, entertainment, meals, or travel. I can do whatever I want on the weekend. I only have to worry about getting myself ready in the morning, so I can sleep until the last possible second.

Overall, my life is good.

Tomorrow, I'll sign the documents to officially purchase my first house. I've heard that moving is one of the five most stressful things in life, and I've never before believed it, but I sure do now! There is so much more stress involved with finding and purchasing a house than there is with renting. And don't even get me started on the loan approval process! (It's enough to give someone a heart condition. No kidding.)

And I wish I had someone to walk by my side, helping me make decisions and sharing the stress.

My parents have been fantastic, checking out houses and going furniture shopping with me, giving advice when I ask for it, and helping me pack. My loan officer has been incredibly patient, reassuring me when the approval process took longer than I thought it should and answering all of my "I have no idea what I'm doing!" questions. My friends have been behind me, cheering me on and praying for wisdom and sanity. My sister Steph has been a great sounding board, always bringing me back to reality. (Also, she mowed my lawn for me tonight so I wouldn't have to take a break from packing to do it. She's pretty awesome.)

But, as wonderful as these people are, they aren't "in it" with me. 

So I want to take a moment to acknowledge something that I usually don't: singleness is hard. It's not my ideal life, but it is my current life. And while journeying through life without a partner is difficult, I shouldn't use it as an excuse for letting my life stagnate.

That's why I took an accounting class this summer (and learned I most certainly should not become an accountant).

That's why I joined a book club through my church, even though meeting new people is difficult for me.

And that's why I'm buying a house.

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what a difference a year (or 13) makes!

When I was at my parents' house yesterday, I came across a stack of my senior pictures. It. Was. Horrifying.

Because I'm getting brave in my old age, I'll post one here.

On the upside, I think I look younger at 30 than I did at 17 ... but is it any wonder this girl never had any dates?

As I marveled at the outward changes in the last 13 years, I started to think about the inward changes, as well. While some things can be attributed to "growing up," I think most of it is directly related to God's work in my life.

• I used to worry about everything. Now, I rarely worry about anything.
• I used to think only of myself. Now, while I'm still quite selfish, I've learned to love others.
• I used to get angry easily (just ask my siblings). Now, it takes a lot to get me fired up.
• I used to be extremely self-conscious. Now, I am confident in who I am and what I can do.
• I used to think life wouldn't truly begin until marriage. Now, while I still hope and pray for a husband, I know I can live a full, happy life as a single woman.

By no means do I think I have "made it." I am more aware than ever of my failings and my need for Christ. But I am also aware of how much He has done in and through me. 

And I praise the Lord that I no longer look like I did at 17!

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just call me handy

I love assembling things. I'm not sure when I first realized this, but I do remember feeling so powerful and independent when I fixed the desk chair in my dorm room. (I wasn't assembling anything per se, but I was putting it back together.) My absolute favorite part of moving is assembling the new furniture. On Tuesday, I had the opportunity to put something together at work—my new desk chair!

Can you see how happy I am?

Putting the arms on. This was the easy part—getting the back on was a bit more difficult.

The finished product. This is so much nicer than my old chair, which was one of those $15 Walmart task chairs.

So if you ever need a bookshelf, chair, or other furniture assembled, just give me a call. I'd love to help you out!

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sometimes, it's better to pay

A few months ago, we were in Kansas cleaning out my grandma's house. While working in the bathroom, I tweeted the following:

@beckyrittaBecky Ritta

Cleaning out grandma's house. Just found some Milk of Magnesia that expired in 1988!

That should have been warning enough to ignore the "treasure" I found in that bathroom—a hot water bottle. But, being my father's daughter, I decided to take the bottle home with me, thus saving the $7 or so I'd pay for one at Walmart.

Flash forward to tonight. I wasn't feeling great, so I decided to dig out the hot water bottle. I filled it, checked it all over for leaks, wrapped it in a towel, and took it to bed with me. Then I found the latest episode of Ringer to watch. (Ringer is my "guilty pleasure" TV of the season. The plot line really is ludicrous, but I enjoy it—just ask Blendy ... I gave her a 20-minute recap of the season while we drove home from Grand Island today!)

So there I was, all settled into my bed, watching Ringer on my computer and trying to get my mind off my stomachache, when suddenly I was wet. Soaking. The hot water bottle had popped like a balloon. For a second, I just lay there while the hot (HOT!) water ran over my stomach and to my backside. Then I leapt to my feet, holding the hot water bottle, trying to contain the remaining water. I was largely unsuccessful.

Water went everywhere. My bed, a memory foam mattress, got soaked. I looked like I'd wet my pants. Somehow, water even got in one of my shoes, which was several feet away from both the bed and the door. Maybe I sloshed the water around when I jumped out of bed?

Somehow, all the electronics escaped unscathed. (Thank goodness!) And I just made the following purchase on Amazon:

I just bought: 'Mabis Dmi Healthcare Rubber Water Bottle, Red, One' by Mabis

www.amazon.com

Large, 2-quart capacity. ribbed surface helps retain warm or cold temperatures. made from durable, natural rubber latex.

Lesson learned.

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